#NationalAdoptionAwareness Month. #Books with Adoption Themes Over the past couple of years, I have tried to take some time out of my required textbook reading to read something that I really wanted to read. I have tried to make that book something that was a non-fiction book that had some type of adoption theme. Some of the books that I have in my own collection are The Girls Who Went Away by Ann Fessler, Born with Teeth by Kate Mulgrew,…
#NationalAdoptionAwareness Month. #Music When it comes to processing my grief, listening to music is one of my coping skills. Music has always been a way for me to release my emotions regardless if it was for grief, being happy or whatever. Some of the songs that hit home for me for my adoption journey are: I Will Always Love You by Dolly Parton, Everything to Me and Remember Me by Mark Schultz. One song that has always been one…
#NationalAdoptionAwareness Month. Z is for #Zen Zen, a word that one may not think of when talking about adoption. How can a topic such as adoption be zen, especially from a birthmother’s perspective? Zen is feeling at peace and relaxed, and this is something that I try to strive for when it comes to looking at these past 13+ years. The first zen moment I had was when I meant D&N for the first time at the adoption agency. On…
#NationalAdoptionAwareness Month. Y is for #Young A lot of people assume that most of birth mothers are under the age of 18, but I was one month away from turning 23 years old. I was at the age where if I had chosen to parent, no one would have even batted an eye since I was not a teenager. It is more common for women in their 20s to plan to place than one who is 16 or 18. I…
#NationalAdoptionAwareness Month. X is for #X-Out X was probably one of the more difficult letters to think of. I then thought about how people have crossed me out of their lives because of my choice to place rather than parent. For them it was easier to walk away rather than address the concerns of a friendship or acquaintance. When it first happened I took it personally, but after 13 years I have came to accept that people have a difficult…
#NationalAdoptionAwareness Month. W is for #Workshops Over the years I have had the opportunity to lead workshops at the annual Birthmom Buds Retreat that is held in Charlotte, NC. This retreat weekend is always held the weekend before Mother’s Day and birthmothers all over the country come together for a fun filled weekend full of laughs and shed tears with those who fully understand the emotions that come along with this side of the adoption triad. Each year I…
#NationalAdoptionAwareness Month. V is for #Vulnerable “The primary mission of the social work profession is to enhance human well-being and help meet the basic human needs of all people, with particular attention to the needs and empowerment of people who are vulnerable, oppressed, and living in poverty…” – National Association of Social Workers: Code of Ethics Preamble Before getting into the social work field, I knew that I had a duty to give back to the adoption community by educating…
#NationalAdoptionAwareness Month. U is for #Understand “Do you understand that you are relinquishing your parental rights and in the state of Oregon once this document is signed, everything is final?” Prior to hearing these words in the hospital, I had counseling sessions with my adoption social worker in her office about what it meant signing the legal documents that would relinquish my parental rights. These forms were something that I had to read every single word and fully understand what…
#NationalAdoptionAwareness Month. Q is for #Quick How does the word Quick relate to adoption? Individuals who are in the adoption world wish and hope that the process of #planning, #waiting, #choosing and #laboring are all things that will be quick and painless. But #adoption is something that is NOT quick for many individuals. Prospective Adoptive parents are told once their home study has been approved to have a bedroom/nursery ready because they will never know when they will get…
#NationalAdoptionAwareness Month. O is for #Open Adoption & Family Services Open Adoption & Family Services (OAFS) is the agency that I chose to work with for placement of Lil Miss. OAFS is in Portland, Oregon but has locations in Eugene, Seattle and was the first agency in Oregon to offer fully open adoptions back in the mid-1980s. I chose to work with OAFS because of how they treated me with the first contact I ever made with them. The counselor…